Show Up & Swim

Last week I spent over 6 hours in the car for pastries. I mean, it was about more than that, but it still resulted in 6 hours in a car for a bakery trip (and we have some amazing bakeries in OBKY). It wasn't about the sweets--though they were tasty--it was about showing up. 

A year ago, I never would have made that drive. I would have sent along my congratulatory text or FB post and stayed home. Opening a small business changes perspective, though.

My old childhood friend (we met in Jupiter, FL about 25 years ago) opened her dream shop in Plainfield, IN. (Shout out to Mama Bird Bakery for anyone in the area--or looking for a road trip.) The grand opening was just a week ago and my Mom and I headed north for a surprise visit. We couldn't make it to the actual event, but we did make it up there and seeing her face when she realized what was happening was pretty damn cool. Why? Because we showed up.

I've learned in the last 11 months how much it matters to me when people just show up. It isn't about spending money or signing up for every service we offer (but um, just remember, there's a LOT of options). It's about walking in the door after driving across town and saying, "Hey! I'm so glad I finally get to come check out your space and tell you I'm proud of you." Showing up for your people MATTERS. (Admittedly, these surprise pop-ins or online booking notifications bring me the most joy.)

Do you show up for your people? Have you slacked on making your relationships a priority?

Are you showing up for you? Sometimes we're really good at showing up for others (I'm guiltily not good at showing up for anyone ever) and not ourselves. Clearly, I've not shown up the way I needed to for me, but driving 6 hours for a homemade pop tart made me realize I can make a little more effort here. 

There was a time in my life when I swam a mile almost every morning before school/work. I spent hours a week in a pool and always made the time to start my day well. I don't even remember how long ago that was a consistent habit, but based on how HARD it was this last time, it's been more than a minute. 

I really didn't want to go. It's cold. My legs were NOT shaved. My hours are long. My fatigue is real. My stress is growing. But I showed up. 

That first night, I spent nearly 90 minutes in the water--obvi, a small snippet of that time was to take a selfie ;) I was slow. So, so slow. I was winded as I tried to remember how to regulate my breathing again. My right shoulder clicked, clicked, clicked with every overhead stroke. My suit didn't stay in place. My lungs burned. My head pounded.

But I showed up that day. For me. I showed up. 

I want to commit to showing up for me. I want to commit to showing up for those that matter to me. I may be juggling a lot right now, but so is everyone else. My "busyness" isn't a reason to stop caring about being present. 

I'm still participating in our medical weight loss program, though my last few weeks has been anticlimactic. I've noticed that I haven't made it as much of a priority during my phase of SURVIVING and not THRIVING (if you know, you know). I'm still sliding in the right direction, so there's no permanent damage here. It's simply a reminder to show up again. 

SW: 324 lbs
CW 287 lbs (2.4 lbs down from last posting)

​Just keep swimming...

Cheers, 
​Kalin